Zen and the Art of Hamburger Butts: A Bruces Blog Mid-Conference Quarter FInals Interlude featuring Text and Graphic.

♬ Ooh wah, ooh wah, cool, cool Brucey ♩
♩Tell us about the boy from new york city. ♫
OOOH YEAH!

I know what you be thinkin, but which boy Brucey? Which boy? Feditanko and his sickkkk 10 goals this season? o}; Dubinsky and his lucky tripple bounces? Nah, man, we aint playing snooker. Lunquiviusk. lol, Have I made fun of his name yet? What a fucking doof. No, readers, we're talking about the team as a whole, they're not great, the're not good, and they can't make romance ♫ The problem is that we just took umm, oh 8 penalties? Can we trade in the pussies in zebra stripes for some refs that know this is playoff hockey? Bottom line, I'm wasn't worried about last game, and I'm not worried about this one, and I get paid to worry. We're gonna take one from MSG and come to finish it at home, that is what you guys wanted, right? 4 games is too short, you get too long a break, get cold, 5 or 6 games is the perfect amount. We'll do it in 5, only because the stupid press loves to dog Brucey. Dog this: The garden is shitty, dank, dark, and smells like Jersey, The New York press is about as dim as the lighting in Pedophile Square Garden. (not a square either.) Check out the post-game interviews if you want to hear the drunkards that call themselves journalists butcher the english language just to ask the same questions over and over, as if they made sense the first time. I'm over this series, I'm over the Rangers, I'm over the guy in the suit named after totino's pizza rolls. (Jeremy, see if we can get me an advertising job for pizza rolls. mmmmm, Ill do it for a years supply, and them installing a microwave in my Merce--Just call me) Everyones been super bummed I've been sitting Fher...sorry? I was pretty sure chimera would have been so excited by this point he would have hurt himself and we'd need my boy Eric. Dollars to donughts Chimpy runs headfirst into the boards this game celebrating he got over 6 minutes of ice time. Im gonna go grab some totino's, its a filling snack you can take anywhere! Does anyone actually know the rules to snooker? Or bumper pool for that matter? We have a table downstairs, I let the cats pee on it...well, I don't let them do anything. We cant really go down to the rumpus room anymore, see, we gave them catnip laced with meth, so theyve gotten pretty aggressive and dont sleep. ever. they've taken over. help.

Kal-AL keeps sending me beard update pictures. This is strange. I hope he stops calling me poppa and asking to sit on my lap.

Bruce.