20,000 Leagues below Verizon: Dec 5, 2011

FUCK!!! Now that the homestand is over this will be the first time I won't be with my boys in years. I'll do my best to make it to as many away games as I can, but I've been trying to set up my subterranean home. I had to kidnap Eakins to set up my internet, those young kids know how to do that, but I think my fucking mask may have scared him, no one must know the goose is loose! i tried to speak gently, but he still peed his pants poor boy, thats why he hasn't scored in the last few games.

I missed my opportunity to sneak onto the belly of the DJKING party air dirigible to get down to florida, I was fighting the alligators that live in the sewers all around the new casa de Brucey. I guess its a lucky thing for the half cocked popo of Sunshine, FLOW-rida, because Brucey woulda had to ice a wholleee bunch of ex-caps due to his new policy of killing anyone getting in the way of a Caps Cup. ...then the murder...ill pin it on moose! the dna will match! then he'll go to jail, and while hes waiting for the needle he'll get his moose caboose stuffed with inmate juice! WHICH IS TOO GOOD FOR THE BASTARD!

You watch out, next time you see the cappies florida. Im starting with all the betrayers, gordo, fleish, strum...ehh, marco can live, he's no threat, and hes been on 17 teams in the last 4 months, I kinda feel bad. BUT YOU WILL LOOSE PANTHERS. BIGTIME. NO ONE TAKES OUR PERCH ATOP THE SOUTHEAST WITHOUT A FUCKING CURB STOP!

BRUCEY SUPPORTS HUNTER.
NOW BRUCEY WILL BECOME A HUNTER.

MOOSE MASON! IF YOU ARE READING THIS TELL THE TRUTH AND RESIGN! YOU ARE RUINING MY RECORD! BRUCEY B BLEEDS RED! TAINT A DUCK FEATHER IN MY BODY! HOW CAN YOU DO THIS TO YOUR TWIN!

pps. my beard itches