Sometimes, important people in my life accuse me of being a “fatfuck”. Remember boys n’ girls, when you say the words “fatfuck” just know that there are “fattestfucks” out there who deserve your ridicule and crippling anger much much much more. Maybe just being a “fatfuck” aint so bad right gals and guys?
Now that we know the difference between “fat” and “fattest” fucks, might as well get started talking about Islanders skip, Jack Capuano. That boys gotta be THICKER than his mammas minestrone!!! FATTER than his mammas cannoli!!! LARGER than his daddys paycheck!!! Cappys led his boys to a 3-5-2 record and a six game losing streak. And I get called a fatfuck?Greener and I spent three hours on the phone last night. Greenie says he’s gonna down as many Strong Island Iced Teas as he can during the game until he passes out in his Scarlet Caps novelty hot tub. The water rocks the red and it smells like sweat and lady parts. I bet Greenys gonna score more times in that hot tub than these Isle boys will on the cold ice. They haven’t scored more than one goal during their losing streak!! HEY CAPPY! STOP EATIN EGGPLANT PARM HOOGIES AND SHUFFLE YOUR LINES!
Thanks for listening.
BRUCE da GOOSE
PSSSSSSS nothing cappy does will matter. We aint been whipped by these isle boys in regulation since 2007. So we gotta make like Snake tonite. Blow that miserable island to bits and then heelie all the way back home. Gotta get svelte so they’ll get me in the TV business again.
No comments:
Post a Comment